Aging Parents The Hearbreak of it all

Maybe I can write this without crying or maybe not.  This is one subject I never wanted to think about.  I just can't imagine all of it.  Yes I tend to hide my head in the sand.  It just gets me through.

First off I love my parents so much, they are who made me and taught me all I know.  I am so close to them and since my brother died in Vietnam in 1968, I am all that they have.  Then my son Dustin died in 2005 and really I am it.

At times I don't feel like I do enough for them.  Everday I talked to them a million times on the phone, go to their house to do the little things that they can no longer do....and do the errands, pay bills, take to doctor, etc.. I still feel guilty for not doing enough.  If I don't do it for them then who will.

Luckily they both are alert, very much so.  Their health is good it is just that they are aging.  Dad is 85 and Mom is 80.  Dad needs attention because 1) he's spoiled 2) he is frail.  Mom needs rest and doesn't get it as often as she should.  It breaks my heart as Mom watches the love of her life, the strong farmer, the man of the house....slip.

Life gets in the way at times preventing me from being there all the time.  Yes I feel guilty because they were always there for me no matter what.  Do any of you have suggestions on how to handle these emotions?

I am their baby girl and they are my heroes.