Life was good for me and my son. Surviving domestic violence, going back to college to earn better pay, cleaning up credit and finally buying a house as a single Mom.
Excitement filled the air as we moved into our new home on April 15, 2005. I was so proud that I could finally offer my son, my only child a house for a home, not an apartment anymore.
Plans were big as he was given the basement to fix up with his pool table, furniture, etc to make it his place for friends (that were always at our house) to enjoy with him. We were busy making our new house a home.
June 7, 2005 started out as a really nice day. Lunch at work with friends, making Dusty his favorite meal, baking chocolate chip cookies all was so nice.
Dusty had been fishing that evening with his friends at a friend's pond. They came home, shot some pool, ate dinner. I went to bed early as I always did. Around 10:30 PM Dusty woke me up to say that he was going fishing at a family friend's cabin at a creek. He fished for catfish and that is usually done at night. I said, "OK, love you!" and he replied, "Love you too Mom."
Back to sleep only to awaken at 12:30 AM (June 8th) by the phone. It was a friend (where they were going fishing) and he told me that Dustin had been in a terrible car accident and that they were going to LifeFlight him.
The daze started at this time as I hurried to get some clothes on and then he called back and said they were taking him to the local hospital after all. Somewhat relieved as his injuries must not be as bad as they thought. I called a friend to take me 1 block to the hospital because there was no way I could have driven.
Once at the hospital I had to register him. The nurse took me to the back in a quiet little room. The doctor came in telling me about his injuries, etc. I abruptly stopped him with my hands in the air, "I just want to know how he is and when can I see him?" the doctor then said to me, "Well he's dead!"
I fell to the floor, screaming, crying and being sucked into a blackhole so fast I didn't know what was going on or where I was going.
My baby boy was gone. For 17 years I was a Mom and had a thriving, active teen in my life....then everything came to a hault. My life changed that day forever as part of me went with Dustin.
To the present, my heart aches so much daily, I think of him almost every second of the day, I cry, I feel sick BUT I still have to live. I live with this each and every day. I wake up thinking about Dusty and go to bed thinking about him.
So many of you have asked me how do I do it. Where does your strength and inspiration come from?
First and foremost my strength comes from God. Without Him I never could have made it one day.
The entire first year Dustin's friends never left my side. They inspired me to keep going, they gave me strength.
My brother was killed in Vietnam in 1968. My Mother was my rock as she knew the pain, she knew the journey that laid ahead of me.
My friends never left my side for a moment. They are the best!
Early on I made a website for Dusty. http://dustin-davis.memory-of.com/About.aspx Through this site I have emailed and actually met others that have lost their child. Then I started helping with an online grief support group http://www.preciousmemorials.com/ and from there I have arranged "Get Togethers" where we all come together from all over the US for a weekend. I have some wonderful friends from there and we talk, visit as often as we can. The Online support group has the most wonderful team of management, they are truly there no matter what. Strength and inspiration.
Etsy....yes Etsy. I have talked to so many wonderful Estians and so many wonderful Bloggers that have been supportive in so many ways. I have been inspired and given strength by so many cannot count them all. So much kindness exists I am at awe.
Keeping busy, helping others, all part of my inspiration and strength.
Living each day as I never know what will inspire me today or give me strength but I look for it in everything I do. You are all part of my strength and inspiration. So I want you to know how much I appreciate each and everyone of you...I really do. I am humbled and honored by you.
See I need you, my friends, my family....my Etsy it is where my inspiration and strength comes from.
Have a blessed day....Nancy